Crossroads

I am pretty sure lahat tayo dumadaan or dumaan sa crossroads...that our heads (sometimes hearts) are aching kakaisip kung ano ang dapat gawin.

Deciding and discerning are so difficult to do. Ipagsolve mo na lang ako ng puzzle or math problem wag lang mag decide kung ano gagawin ahaha OA.

Before I wrote this entry, I was in a crossroad. Di ko alam kung ano ang tamang gawin. Yung isa, alam kong hiningi ko talaga kay Lord yun pero may major isang problem lang talaga (minsan napapaisip ako na di talaga binibigay ni Lord lahat ano? =p Siguro dapat we will earn it.). Yung isa naman, I will not do anything, ganito pa rin ako...pero sayang yung opportunity ng isa. Ahaha palabo na ng palabo. Basta my decision was to go forward. Sayang ang opportunity. Bibihira yung ganong opportunity, ang hirap palampasin. Bahala na si Lord sa akin. Ipinagdasal ko naman yun thus, I know I am on the right road. =D

Rainbow

I love rainbows...whenever I am down and I see a rainbow, naku matutuwa na ako nyan...kasi I know God has a pleasant surprise for me haha parang ang selfish, akin lang...syempre for us =)

The most memorable one I had concerning rainbows was last March 2008. That was the time that we were trying to get pregnant. I used a home pregnancy test kit and negative ang lumabas. But my husband said na di daw, positive daw kasi 2 lines. Kaya I thought negative kasi the second line was super faint....parang aninag or reflection lang. So I told my husband that we do the test after 3 days. That was a Friday. The next day we went to Tagaytay to hear mass at Pink Sisters. Syempre I was praying na sana nga pregnant na ako. Then, we saw a rainbow. Sobrang tuwa ko kasi I know yun na yung sagot ni Lord! So after 3 days nga, we tested again, ayun kita na yung 2nd line. =)

Last Sunday, I was praying to God na magmanifest Sya to tell me that I will be okay, that He has plans and that these will be better. I asked for a sign and one of those is a rainbow. We went to my parents house last Sunday. So the whole time traveling to and from Las Pinas, I was waiting for a rainbow. But sadly, di ako nakakita.

Yesterday, as I was driving along EDSA, wala na sa isip ko na makakita ng rainbow. Then, I saw a rainbow. It was bright and clear and it was in front of me! Gusto ko nga tumigil sa gitna ng EDSA para lang titigan ahaha! I cried while driving kasi alam kong God sent that rainbow to tell me that He is here with me. I believe His plans will be unfolded soon!

''For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord.
Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.''
Jeremiah 29:11

This too shall pass

I am sad...anxious...afraid. I keep on asking God why. Why now, why me, why this, why why why? Mabait naman ako. Nagdadasal. Tumutulong. Pero bakit? 

I am trying hard not to question Him anymore. If I start worrying and pitying myself, I think of happy thoughts. I force myself to think that I am blessed. Marami pa rin naman talaga akong blessings to be thankful for. I pray. 

If I feel down, I just try hard to trust God. That God has plans and His plans will be better, maybe grander. And these are the quotes/verses that I keep on saying to myself (kasi kungdi baka dalhin na lang ako sa Basement ng Makati Med. Haha!) 

• This too shall pass
• Behold, I have carved you on the palms of My hands - Isaiah 49:16 
• If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
• There are always uncertainties ahead, but there is always one certainty--God's will is good. - Vernon Paterson 
• For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. - Isaiah 41:13
• Something good is going to happen to us

Masakit pero kaya ko ito. Dapat. Kakayanin ko to.